How to stand out at work: Improve your interpersonal skills

Developing your interpersonal skills is crucial to the success of any career plan. Your colleagues, managers, mentors and clients will help shape your career trajectory, so building strong, productive relationships should be a top priority.

Here are some tips to help you get started:

1. IMPROVE YOUR LISTENING SKILLS

‘The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood.’Dr Ralph Nichols

We all want to feel listened to and understood. Being a good listener, or what Stephen Covey would call an empathic listener, will help you build strong relationships with the people around you.

Being an empathic listener means that you intentionally listen to what someone is saying, rather than simply waiting for your turn to speak.

Start being a better listener today with these tips:

  • Give your undivided attention. Put your phone down
  • Pay attention to body language and speech patterns. These will tell you a lot about how a person is feeling about a conversation
  • Don’t interrupt
  • Summarise key points to let the person know you’ve understood

Discover more ways to improve your listening skills

2. DON’T BE AFRAID TO SAY NO

It’s tempting to say yes to every request that comes your way at work, especially when you’re trying to impress. But this can lead to you being overloaded with work. As your to do lists and stress levels increase, you’ll be less able to focus on relationship building and may even start to resent your colleagues and managers for the long hours you have to put in.

Managing your workload effectively will give you the time and space to maintain positive working relationships. And sometimes that will mean saying no.

Here’s how to say no assertively:

  • Be honest and upfront when explaining your reasons for saying no
  • Be firm. Say no, rather than "I’m not sure" or "Maybe"
  • Maintain eye contact and confident body language
  • Show empathy by using phrases such as “I realise you’re really up against it…”
  • Suggest an alternative solution

Learn how to say no with confidence

3. STAY PROFESSIONAL

If you’ve received a complaint from a manager, client or colleague it can be difficult not to take it personally and react in kind. But this can often make the situation worse and damage working relationships further.

Dealing with the situation calmly and professionally will help prevent any lasting damage and can even be a way to impress those around you.

Here are some tips to help you deal with difficult situations:

  • Let the other person involved have their say without interruption. Let them get their point across and try not to argue back while they’re talking. This is an ideal time to put your empathic listening into practice
  • Acknowledge the issue by summarising what the other person has said and asking them to confirm that you’ve understood correctly
  • Offer an apology
  • Suggest a solution or ask the other person how they would like to resolve the situation. Follow up on any agreed action points quickly

Learn how to give difficult feedback

Developing your interpersonal skills will help you build the positive, productive relationships that will help you achieve your career goals. For more advice on improving your relationships, try our free online course; Emotional intelligence for success

Work with a Career Coach